BOOK REVIEW
By Audrey DeLaMarte
We learn by trial and error, tying to do the right thing. Sometimes we screw up big time. And sometimes in spite of all our efforts, life piles on almost more pain than we can shoulder. In those times we cling to a friend. Many times that friend is AA. I’ve never read a memoir that shows that more clearly than Bill McPhie’s A Friend of Bill’s. McPhie, a grandfather now, began smoking and using alcohol early, in reaction to growing up under the structure of being a bishop’s son, he says, and he was hooked. In his 30’s he joined AA and found sobriety and balance for the first time. He and his wife Stella, went to meetings together, he went alone, he sponsored many people and became a life-long advocate. AA didn’t make life easy, but it did give him friends and tools for coping when life tested him.
Due to a combination of human ignorance and the alcoholic gene, his daughter Sandi, suffered greatly. Sandi had trouble sleeping from the beginning – so her doctor gave them Paregoric, an opium derivative, and then alcohol to help her sleep. That began a journey for her 30-some years later in suicide. During that time Stella developed cancer, went through surgery and treatment and died anyway. Through it all, Bill worked the program and survived, older, wiser and still sober.
This is the kind of story that brings both laughter and a lump to the throat. It’s effective testimony of a program in which helping ourselves and others is mixed seamlessly. There are times of unintended humor in this self-published memoir because Bill doesn’t know the fine points of punctuation and copyediting—commas fall like dandruff. However, I have a feeling that, if that were pointed out to Bill, he’d laugh with us
Audrey DeLaMartre is a developmental editor, consultant, writer reviewer and has been award the 1995 Polly Bond Award for journalistic excellence in reviewing
“Impossible to put down. I was moved, I was appalled, I was amused. I felt like a hitch hiker on your roller coaster and profoundly grateful for the trip.” P. Cleveland, Encino, Ca.
“I have no doubt that it was God inspired, how else can one survive the pain?” M. Reller, Beverly Hills, Ca
A good writer..and even a good speaker...must be on a conversational level.....and you do that well...it is a true story and a great story. FRANKLY, I think it would make an excellent movie and I join you in knowing that, that is done."
Dr. Tom Costa, Minister, Palm Desert, Ca.
"I found your draft of "A Friend Of Bill's" in a flight attendant jump seat on a plane to Detroit. I hope you didn't mind, but I glanced through it -- and found I could not put it down. It is a very moving autobiography and I hope your story gets published one day, so that it may get the audience it deserves."
Samantha F.S. Chan, Pamona, New York
"I enjoyed the style, if you will, that was used to introduce Sandi. Her being was gradually presented, and then, by the time the subject matter got a bit unpleasant, it was too late. We were already hooked, and committed to finish the story. In spite of adversity, you always seem to manage a quip."
Bill Sheehan, Phd, Toledo, Ohio
"One of the most inspirational books I have read in a long time. Really a must read for any alcoholic in recovery."
Don Calvert, Redondo Beach, Ca.
